Then he he hit the wall. He had a burnout. I watched him. He literally looked like a shell of a man. The sparkle in his eye was gone. The joy disappeared. His faced looked long and sad. At times, he acted like a zombie. His family went through very difficult times. He was burnt out. I don't know if he ever recovered...
I was perhaps 27 years old at the time. I observed what happened to him. I vowed to never let that happen to me.
I grew up in what I would consider a workaholic family. Many of my family was/is very driven. I became driven concerning Christian ministry. While I never understood how someone could work for 70-80 hours a week, I began to spend very large amounts of time "doing church." I followed in my mentor's footsteps.
Within a few months of Karen and I getting married, we began teaching Sunday School for large groups of junior highers. We began helping more with young people. Having one then two children didn't slow us down. When the renewal/revival wave hit, it became even more pronounced. We often spent several nights a week in church services. We started going to conferences. Go. Go. Go.
There reached a point where we were spending about five nights a week on church-related activities. During this time we never took a vacation of more than two days. In fact, we went about 10 years without a real vacation. We went to church conferences instead.
Then we decided to start our own ministry/business. We worked even harder, not stopping any of the other things, but adding this on top of all the rest of our activities. My day job began to suffer. I got very little sleep. I couldn't focus. I was burning out. I talked with my boss, and took one month off work. I was in bad shape. I was supposed to rest and recover. Instead, I spent almost 200 hours that month (more than I would have worked at my job) doing stuff for our new "ministry". It was all a waste. I was even more stressed out, the ministry project was a failure, and I was not rested.
It took me a while to return to full speed in my job. My time with my family greatly suffered because I was too busy. And it was all in the name of "Christianity".
A few years went by, and God said it was time to stop our ministry. It was very hard to do, because I was driven. But I was burnt out in ministry. The strength was not there.
A few weeks later, Karen and I went to Hawaii. We will never be the same. Eight days in paradise. A few months later, our entire family went on a month-long trip around the United States. It was a huge vacation. Something we absolutely loved. We will never be the same.
Two years have gone by. I am not nearly as driven as I was. But it has been a very slow process. I spend much more time with my family. We were caught in a rat-race of ministry. Now we are healing up from the burnout. I am starting to get some balance in my life.
Yes, we had accomplished much. Yes, we were wholly devoted to God. Yes, we loved what we were doing. But the balance was not there. The balance of ministry with family. The balance of relaxation with the going. The balance of refreshing versus giving. The balance between real friendships versus ministry relationships.
My friend became a shell of a person. I don't ever want to become that. We all need balance in our lives. We need to be able to say no to things when we get too busy. We need to know that our family is more important than ministry. We need to chill out and enjoy life. We need to be able to relate to others on a personal level instead of a ministry level.
Are you on the road to burnout? Have things gotten out of balance in your life? It may not be too late. Take it from me, burnout is a horrible thing. Recovery is not quick. I encourage you to take steps now to avoid burnout.
Keith
Yes! I agree Keith. Thank you for sharing this.
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