Perseverance

Note: I originally preached this as a sermon, and I've modified it slightly to better fit with reading it.

Some of you have been Christians for many years, others of you perhaps not so long.  You may have heard articles or messages that were preached on this topic.  I know I've heard many.  But too often, until you actually live it out, it is just words.  When it becomes your life, it sinks in.  This is one of those messages that my family and I are living out right now.

So I want to share with you concerning the topic of perseverance.  You know, perseverance is one of those words that float around the church.  It also is a word often used in business, sports, or in making life choices.  I would think that everyone agrees that it is good to have perseverance.

Example

It seems that some people seem to be born with a great amount of perseverance.  Others, perhaps, not as much.  Now I have an example of a famous man who had great courage, persistence, and perseverance.  See if you can guess who it is:

• Failed in business (age 22)
• Ran for Legislature - defeated age 23
• Again failed in business 24
• Elected to Legislature 25
• His sweetheart died 26
• Had a nervous breakdown 27
• Defeated for Speaker 29
• Defeated for Elector 31
• Defeated for Congress 34
• Elected to Congress 37
• Defeated for Congress 39
• Defeated for Senate 46
• Defeated for Vice President 47
• Defeated for Senate 49 
• Elected President of the United States at age 51

Any idea of who I'm talking about?  That's the record of Abraham Lincoln. Defeat. Setbacks. Battling against great odds. I've read numerous books on Abraham Lincoln because he fascinates me.  I think part of it is that he had so many setbacks, but he continued to persevere on to greatness -  leading our country through an incredibly difficult time.

Biblical Examples

There are several men in the Bible that I am also drawn to.  Their stories and their lives continually spark my interest.  They speak into my life and encourage me.  Let's look at a few:

• Moses:  given up for adoption to the Pharoah's daughter.  Raised in the palace.  Has everything - power, money, fame.  Knows he must stand for what is right but goes about it the wrong way.  Flees to the desert, lives there for many years.  God calls him out.  He fights it.  Surrenders to his calling.  Leads the nation of Israel out of an impossible situation. 
• Joseph: has dreams, has favor with his parents.  Hated by siblings. Thrown in a pit.  Sold as a slave. Rises in favor and power with Pharoah.  Wrongly accused of attempted rape.  Thrown into prison.  Forgotten. Restored to leadership.  Second in power in the land.  Forgives and restores his broken family. Incredible favor on his life.
• David: Humble beginnings.  Simply loved God and wants to do what is right.  Great favor, kills Goliath.  Part of the King's household. Jealousy of him by King Saul.  Almost killed by the king.  Waits for his time.  King dies.  David ruler of only Judah for 7 years.  Finally becomes king of all of Israel.
• Paul: hater and killer of Christians. Radically saved. Face-to-face encounter with Jesus.  Eyesight restored by the only person who believed in him.  In Arabia between 3-14 years before starting ministry. Still no one trusts him.  Constant beatings, prisons, shipwrecks.  But he continues on.

These are some of my heroes of the faith.  Why?  Because they persevered.  They kept at it.  They overcame the odds.  

More than inspiration

But it is more than just inspiration.  Lots of people, events, movies, and other things can inspire us.  But these guys in the Bible had something else.  It went deeper than determination or even stubbornness.  God was doing something in their lives.  He was transforming their lives.  They all went through seasons of great testing of their faith.  They were not the same people later in their lives as they were starting out.  They were transformed.  

James 1:2-4 tells us: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

Real trials

I'm going to be real honest here (as I have tried to be in every blog article).  I have read these verses numerous times over the years.  I've nodded my head.  I've agreed with the verses.  I'd said in my head, "I am mature, so I guess I've had my trials."  But that was just arrogance.  I realize now, I didn't have much for trials.  I mean real trials.  Not just the "Oh I broke a nail" kind of trials.  I mean the kind that really tests your faith.  Sure there are setbacks and challenges and discouragements.  

• But what about the kind that test your faith?  
• The kind that make you question everything?  
• The kind that make you question if God is really there?
• Or that He really is for you and not against you?
• The kind where you want to give up, but He is the one hanging on to you and you can't?
• The kind where all of your hopes and dreams come crashing down and you scream at God: "BUT YOU SAID!!!"?
• The kind where you give it your all and your prayers aren't answered the way that everyone thinks they should be answered? 

Those are trials.  Those are testings of your faith.

My story

Let me share a bit of my story with you.  Karen (my wife) and I got married and immediately began serving in church, teaching Sunday School, helping with the youth, and in other areas of the church.  A few years later, God called us very clearly into full time ministry.  I attended Bible college while still working my job.  We continued serving.  God called us to a church in another denomination.  We had to start all over.  We eventually became the volunteer youth pastors, were on the leadership team. Served, served, served.  We had great favor.  I thought we were mature.  

But then God ambushed us.  He said, "You are done," and took us into a new season.  Sure we had had lots of challenges, starting over numerous times during our first 15 years of serving in ministry.  But we had overcome all of these issues.  We had a lot of determination.  But this time, God really threw us.  He wanted us to go through a season of real testing.  The testing of the faith.  So He yanked the rug out from under us.  

• No more ministry. 
• No more status. 
• Most of our friends quickly abandoned us.  
• People didn't understand. 
• Severe illnesses for my wife and I that lasted years.  
• Confusion.  
• Money issues. 
• Marriage issues. 
• Major challenges with a few of our children. 
• Horrific double-suicide of my newlywed niece and her husband.  
• Horrible month-long coma and death of Karen's sister from out of nowhere. 
• Serious undiagnosed illnesses return. 

It felt like everything fell apart.  "God - where are you?  What are you doing?  Why won't you take us out of this pit?  Are you even there?"  No answers.  Eighteen years ago was the call to full time ministry.  "Now the testing of your faith produces perseverance."  There was nothing left.  It was a Job season.  All was gone.

That's when things get really raw.  Prayers aren't so elegant any more.  Joy doesn't come easy.  You question every belief and doctrine.  

Valleys

I'd like to think and tell people that when you begin your relationship with Jesus that everything will be OK.  I like the favor, the blessings, the status, the joy.  I like the mountaintops.  But those aren't the defining elements and seasons of our lives.  It is in these valleys, these testings of the faith, the low points of our lives where we are shaped.

Again, look at these verses:  

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

The progession to maturity

I was so arrogant.  I thought I was mature.  Surely since I was a leader, since I had favor, since I was called to ministry, since I prayed a lot, since I tried to be holy:  surely now I was mature in the faith.  But I was nothing.  It is these testings that bring about perseverance. Those verses spell it out:  THEN AFTER perseverance is finished, then you (and I) will be MATURE AND COMPLETE!!!   Not lacking ANYTHING!

I look at Moses, Joseph, David, and Paul.  They were tested. I can imagine the struggles they had in their minds. The discouragement. The depression. The anger and frustration at times. The questioning of God. "But you said." They went through the testings of their faith.  And after those testings, they were mature.  They were able to lead.  They were able to achieve great things for the Kingdom of God.  They persevered and in the end they lacked nothing for they were mature.

We may not be the next Abraham Lincoln, Moses, Joseph, David, or Paul, but God does want each of us to mature and to fulfill the incredible plans and purposes He has for each of us.

What are you going through?

I have no idea what you are going through right now, whether that is you personally, as a family, or as a church.  But I believe that this message is not just for me.  I never have, and don't ever want to be the preacher who just says what people WANT to hear, I want to be the one who says what people NEED to hear.  You may be being tested right now.  You may be questioning everything.  You may be ticked off at God.  You may only see the junk and the sin in your life.  You may be feeling like it is all for nothing.  You may be feeling like you are losing hope.  I am telling you, God is in this.  He is testing your faith, bringing perseverance to bring maturity.  

Song

Two days after I began to prepare for this message, I was out running.  I have been very sick with an undiagnosed illness, and had to take three months off of running.  I've been battling back, trying to continue to run even though not everything was right.  On that day, every step was a battle.  I couldn't go on.  I didn't want to go on.  The mental challenge was tremendous.  As I ran, this song came on my iPhone.  I had never heard it before.  It was God speaking to me.  Not only for me to be able to make it through the run, but it was also an allegory of life.  That I would make it.  That we would make it. Here are some links to "The Sun is Rising" by Britt Nicole

• Watch a video with lyrics & music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO36F--Vn1g
• Purchase it at: https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/gold/id601356878

As you listen, please allow the Holy Spirit to encourage you and strengthen your spirit.

The sun IS rising.  You ARE gonna make it.  A powerful song, that I hope is speaking powerful encouragement to us all. 

Prayer

If any of what I've said today is speaking to your heart, we'd love to pray with you.  Not for you but with you.  We are walking through this individually, but we can also pray and encourage each other along the way.  If you'd like prayer, please let Karen or I know and we'd love to pray with you.  If this blog article has spoken to your spirit, I'd love to hear about it.

May the testings of your faith bring perseverance which will lead to maturity! Amen.

Is that even spiritual?

Do you ever wonder if things that you do are even spiritual?

Do you ever feel guilty enjoying your favorite hobby?
Do you ever think you should be doing "more spiritual" things?

A lot has changed for me in the past few years. Some of my perspectives have changed. Perhaps I see things a bit differently now. Maybe clearer... Maybe more confused.

One thing I have been trying to learn is that this life is about the journey. What do we do when circumstances change for us? How do we adapt? What is it that we are to learn?

If you take an extremely good basketball player and throw him on the baseball field, he may or may not be very well prepared for the different kind of game.

You could take a person who focuses only on bench pressing and can lift 300 pounds of weight and then have him try to do leg lifts; he may only be able to lift a low weight amount.

A person well versed in theory of social issues could be thrown into a soup kitchen for a week and find herself completely overwhelmed with those she may come in contact with.

We get used to our environments and those around us; we use our strengths and try to hide our weaknesses. We try to make things comfortable for ourselves.

Then we get thrown a curveball.

Things begin to change. We react. We change. We reevaluate our priorities. We live.

But what do we learn?
Why do we do the things we do?
Why do we have these interests in seemingly frivolous things?
Why are we made individually the way we are?

I take a look around at my family, friends, and co-workers. No one is alike. We may have common interests or even blood lines, but each are unique. If all Christians are being made to be Christlike, wouldn't we all start having the same interests?

I'm beginning to see in a new light how our interests can help us. It sounds so simple. Perhaps I am just slow. To be honest, I used to think that as we "became more spiritual", we would stop "wasting" our time on our hobbies. I use my own life as an example: I loved sports, especially basketball. I played in a church league but it (ironically) got too violent. I shunned it. I liked watching sports games and going to them. That turned into "a waste of time." I enjoyed helping people with their computers. That turned into getting in the way of ministry. I loved traveling, seeing historical sites, and camping. Instead we went about ten years without any real vacation, and only went to church conferences or on missions trips. Those things were spiritual. Not basketball, not computers, not vacations.

As I have previously blogged, my family has gone through quite the season the last few years. I have a few interests now that have risen to the surface; the primary one is running. It may be running for me, but there is some hobby/interest/passion that each of us may have that seems unspiritual but we enjoy.

Could it be that God wants to do something in me through running?

Could He be teaching you something through your interests?

Could He be using your interests to connect you with people in a real way?

Are you listening?  Are you learning?

Negative Splits - A lesson in finishing strong

Bear with me as I tell of another way God spoke to me through running. I hope this speaks to and
challenges anyone who has gotten sidetracked or grown weary in their Christian walk.

Once I started getting beyond the "I think I'm going to die if I run more than a few minutes" mode, I started to learn about pacing myself. If I was to run for a half an hour, it became very important that I had enough energy to last a half an hour. Naturally our tendency is to start out full of energy and then we just go until we can't go any more. But in running, that is very dangerous: what if you don't have enough energy to make it to the end?

In running they instruct you to develop what is called "negative splits". This is when you divide the total distance into certain distances, like a mile, and with each mile, keep increasing your speed. The goal is to get progressively faster throughout the run. Start slower and build speed. At the end you are going your fastest. At the end you are able to give it your all since you still have energy.

This is great in theory, but in practice it is difficult. Generally, for me, on a four mile run the first two miles are great, then in the third mile, I slow down. I start to have mind battles. I have doubts. I want to quit. I get tired. I wonder if I can make it to the end.

But I push through. Usually, my fourth mile is the strongest since I know I can go all out.

It is the mid-point that gives me trouble. It is in the midst of the run that I begin to doubt. It is at the halfway point that I wonder if this is worth it.

The goal is the negative split. Start out nicely, but pace yourself. Finish strong.

I read an article about a guy who was running a marathon and dropped over dead close to the finish line. He didn't make it. I've been in races where people start out strong. Way ahead of me. Then they hit the wall and can't run any more. They start walking. I pass them. That's awkward. That's embarrassing.

Our pastor has been preaching a sermon series about Elijah. Elijah did all kinds of great things. But when Jezebel said she wanted him dead, Elijah ran away. I've heard numerous messages about what happened in the cave. Some have put a positive spin on it. But one message has stuck out in my mind. Elijah wanted to give up and die. After all God did to encourage him and speak to him, Elijah still had a "woe-is-me" attitude. So God said to anoint two kings, and anoint a successor for Elijah. Elijah was through. He was done. Fired. Off the team. Game over. How sad. What a way to end. Obviously, that wasn't the original plan. Elijah was perhaps the greatest prophet. But he didn't endure to the end.

When it got tough, he caved (pun intended).

That may sound harsh, but it appears to be true.

How often have we seen people start out so strong, and then quickly slow to a walk? Or stop? Perhaps that has been you (or me).

Negative splits. Each season we are running progressively faster. Stronger and stronger.

As we mature, we should realize even more of what we have inside of us. Who we have inside of us. To know that we have the strength to go the distance.

I'm not going to quote you a bunch of scriptures, but think about these stories: Moses, David, Abraham, Joseph, Job, and Paul. They all had pivotal experiences part way through their lives. They could have quit right then. They could have stopped the race. But they didn't. They dug down. They put their inner faith in Someone much greater than themselves. They finished strong.

A verse that rings through my head is this: "You were running a good race. Who cut in on you to keep you from obeying the truth?" (Galatians 5:7) So many of us have started out strong. You may have been radically saved and things went well for a while but then you began to compromise. You may have started out strong in your ministry, but your passion faded. You may have been passionately in love with Jesus, but now He is a distance memory. Who cut in on you? Where is that inner resolve to push through the hard times? Do you have what it takes to finish this race strong?

Young people whom I have been around: Are you still going strong? Did someone cut in on you? Are you still passionate for God? Are you running a negative split? Are you getting stronger and stronger in your faith?

In my running, I have only stopped running once in the middle of a run, and that was because I was very ill. I wish I could say the same thing about this spiritual journey that I am running. It is easier said than done. I'm right there with you. But that doesn't make it right. I feel some of the fight coming back. I feel some of the desire to press on. I feel some of the contending rising up inside of me. I am beginning to have hope and vision for the second half of the race. I will be a contender. I will finish strong. I will run this race with negative splits.

Will you join me?

The Man in the Mirror

I raise my head and gaze forward

Looking
A reflection
Who is that?
Almost unrecognizable
Where did he come from?
Why is he looking back at me?

I move my head to the left
He moves with me
I move to the right
He shadows my every move

It is me
But I do not recognize him
Seldom do I look in the mirror
Somewhere, sometime, I have changed
I look different

I move closer to the mirror
Staring
I see a large scar
Across my cheek it stretches
Ugly, noticeable, unhidden
No makeup would cover it

Where did it come from?
What caused it?
Does it matter?

I see the lines across my forehead
Aging?
No, those are from challenging situations
The marks of stress
The marks of concern
Prayers of anguish

The face is haunting me
I see the changes
He looks older
Not wiser, just older
Weather-beaten

The carefree look is gone
More seasoned
More experienced
More reserved

Who is he?
What has happened to me?
Is this really me?

Bruises
The marks of brutal fights
Obviously not the winner
What were those fights?
Did anyone help him in the end?

Nose looks broken
Slightly bent to the right
Something significant happened
Even with healing, it will still show
Show the markings of the past

Intently I stare into his eyes
Seeing so much
The look of pain
The recognition of sorrow
The flinch of reaction to rejection
The trepidation that comes with misunderstandings
The light of hope faded

Empty
Vacant

Wait
There is something else
This face that looks gruesome
This man in the mirror
Somehow he looks vaguely familiar
Not like me, but like someone else

Who am I seeing?
Someone else
A faint resemblance

The One who suffered
Nothing attractive about Him
One who knew pain firsthand
Not given a second glance

Ever so faintly
I can see
We looked down on Him
Thought He was scum

He carried our pains
All the things wrong with us
Disfigured
Scarred
Broken
The plan all along
Crushed in order to give life

My brother
Whom I call Lord
A glimpse
I can see Him
Ever so faintly

Sorrows
Pain
Rejection
Loss
Despised by man
Betrayed
He bore it all

The man in the mirror
It is me
Yet I see someone else
A faint family resemblance
Ever so faint
But it is there
A few of the same lines as I see upon my Brother
I see in me a glimpse of the Father.

~ Keith Koerner, April 17, 2013

The Process

Stress and anxiety

Reoccurring medical issues

Heart racing, pain, inflammation

No ability to even do household responsibilities

Get in the hot tub, she says

The night air is cool

No wind, stillness

Not too hot, not too cold

Just right

I sink into my favorite spot

A deep seat with ten jets on my back and shoulders 

My foot finds the small water circulation jet

My arms float out to the sides
Hands being massaged by the neighboring jets

I begin to relax

I reach to the side to grab the bottle

The occasional Bud Light is just right 

The cold smooth liquid streams down my throat

I gaze at the sky

Clear with billions of stars

Beginning to find peace

Only the sound of the jets churning the water

A small plane crosses the horizon 

Its light flashing across the sky

A small dot amongst billions of dots

I am that dot

Just another dot

But I am unique

I do make a difference 

The skyline wouldn't be the same

I have value

Another sip

More difficult to see high into the sky 

The eyelids droop

No matter

It is peace

I have value

I do not need to see

The jets turn off automatically after a time

I move to the foot massage chair

Thirty micro jets pounding upon my feet

Working the nerve endings

The pulsating release brings relaxation to the entire body

The eyelids are heavy

I am here

I see differently

Does it matter?

Am I awake?

The plane is gone

I am here

Semi conscious 

I am praying

Or just being

The control

The anxiety 

The wishing things were different

Does it matter?

Can I change things?

I cannot

I just am

I am in part of the journey through life

The Process

Why must I try to dictate that life?

Why do I try to write my own story?

Am I the author?

My arms float to the side 

Asleep yet awake

The mind has shut down and I just am

No need to control

No need to plan

No need to stress

Just be

The head droops 

I am awake 

I am staring at the water

I look up 

Billions of stars

I am one

The vast canvas of The Incredible Artist

The beer is all gone

The stress is all gone

The anxiety is all gone

The head droops

Why can't I remain like this?

The jets stop

All is quiet to the ears

My spirit continues to hear the Sounds of Life

I choose to turn the jets back on for more pounding of my feet

I choose to bask on this place a bit longer

Twenty minutes longer

Why do I rush away?

What is my hurry?

It is in The Secret Place that I find peace 

Will I find it elsewhere?

Why do I so easily forget?

Am I so dull?

Right now I am not dull

I am being refreshed

I am alive

A dot is flashing across the sky

I can see

Others can see

I am part of the display of His Glory

The glory that covers the earth

My head droops

Semi conscious 

I give myself up

I must decrease

He must increase

I am at peace 

Now I can rest

Now I embrace The Process

What if...?

What if...

...We loved Jesus as much as we love guns?

...We were as committed to Christ as we are to exercise?

...We were as passionate about Christianity as we are about politics?

...We were as dedicated to reaching people as we are about keeping up with the Kardashians?

...We were as willing to talk about Jesus as we are to talk about the weather?

...We were as hungry for spiritual things as we are for fast food?

...We were as concerned with reflecting the image of God as we are about fitting in with the world?

...We loved our neighbors instead of isolating ourselves from them?

...We loved God more than ourselves?

 

What if?

 

 It bothers me when I am not making an impact.  It bothers me when I am a poor reflection of Jesus.  It bothers me when I am a poor husband and father.  It bothers me when I don't have the mind of Christ.  It bothers me when I care more about worldly things than I do about eternal things.

Do these things ever bother you?

What if we are were 100% followers of Christ?  How would we be different?  How would our worlds around us be changed?  What if?

There is Hope!

We can look at life's circumstances and wonder when things will ever change.

We cry out for a transformation in our lives.

We long to be more like Jesus.

We want answers to our prayers.

We contend for change in our lives, our marriages, our families, our finances, and our relationships.

We wonder when we will ever be out of the pit.

We wonder when it will become a new season.

Yet, it seems like things stay the same.  A battle rages within our minds: Will it ever be different?  Will we be stuck with the same issues all our lives?  Will we ever be free?  Is there hope?  Is anything actually going on?

There is hope
I know many people who have been going through serious things in the past several years. After months, years, even decades of struggles, we can be tempted to succumb to the belief that things won't change.  We wonder if there has been any progress.  We wonder if God really will change us.  In the midst of the battle, our faith becomes weak.  We can only see from our own perspective, which is probably not the best one.  Recently, as I was out running, God allowed me to see a different perspective.

I was running along, and it was a challenging day.  I was a bit discouraged because it didn't feel like my running was any easier.  Here I've been running quite a bit for many months, and yet almost every time it is a challenge.  I can feel the strain on my body, I can feel tired, I am continually wanting to just quit, I have to push through the challenge of my body just wanting to sit on the couch.  Many times, a few miles into it, I have the temptation to just stop running for the day. So, this day as I was running, I was questioning why it is constantly a challenge, wondering when it would ever get easier.  Surely by this time, I should just be able to glide across the ground, mile after mile, smiling and not even breaking a sweat.  I should feel like the wind is gently whispering through my hair, birds are singing, the world is cheering me on, that I could just run the entire distance across the USA, that I could talking easily while running, not even breathing heavily.  Right?  No.  It is not that way. 

I use an app on my iPhone that keeps track of all of my runs.  It tracks my speed, my mileage, my minutes per mile, and even gives monthly totals and averages.  It was then that God reminded me that I am making progress.  As I look at my performance statistics, I can see that I now run a few minutes per mile faster, I run further, I am less tired, I have quicker recovery, I have lost over 35 pounds, and I feel way better than I used to.  What God showed me is that as I have gotten in better shape, my body allows me to push for new challenges.  My body takes me to another level.  I continue to challenge myself, as I overcome one obstacle, I immediately strive to attain the next.  At one point it was all I could do to run one minute, then 10, then a mile, then 5k, now I'm up to seven miles and continuing to push myself to new levels.

Spiritually speaking
Then God began to encourage me about my life.  Just as I felt like things were not improving while running, when in fact they were, other things in my life were also improving.   It didn't mean that all challenges just went away.  It didn't mean that now life was all grand and wonderful.  But in the midst of opposition and challenges, I was being strengthened.  I was getting in better "spiritual shape."  Challenges continue to be there, pushing me to be even more reliant upon His grace.

For all of us
May this be an encouragement to us all.  In the midst of our storms of life, I would wager to say that things actually have been happening.  It may not be fun, it may be painful, it may be that God is stripping away layers of our own righteousness, it may be that now we are feeling less spiritual.  But it is all a process.  The goal is not for us to be happy.  The goal is not for us to be rich, good-looking, and on top of the world all the time.  Christianity is a mess.  It messes us up.  It makes us not even recognize our old selves.  Jesus comes in, and rearranges the house, tearing down all that is not of him.  The goal is for Him to be King, for Him to increase and us to decrease, for us to reflect His true love.  And that is a painful process.  He wants to beat the "crap" out of all of us.  So the stripping away, the circumstances we go through, the loss we suffer, the anguish in our souls, are all part of the "training program."  We are being changed!  We are making progress!  We are being strengthened in the very core of our beings!

In the midst of it all, our perspective says nothing is happening.  But that it not true.  God is doing a good work in you and He is faithful to complete it.  He will make a church that is a glorious bride.  He is always with us, never forsaking us.  He is the same yesterday, today, and forever - not just "being nice" to us sometimes and "abandoning us" or "being mean" to us at other times.  Just like the running challenges I face, He continually places challenges before us.  Eventually, we learn to rely upon Him, allowing Him to carry us - broken and humbled - through the storms. 

Don't give in to the lies.  Things are changing!  You are being transformed into His likeness.  You are overcoming!  You are not alone! God is good - all the time - in the "good" times and the "bad" times.  The church is become stronger.  You are victorious.  In the end, we win.

Keith